Fuh-reezing.

I just can't cope.

Can't adapt.

It's a lost case, I gave up a long long time ago.

There are many many things I can handle, yet there's one thing I'll never manage to adapt to.

The coldness.
It's ironic how I live in the Netherlands, where 3/4 of the time it's cold (spring is considered as 'relatively warm', no sir, to me it's fuh-reezing).
The very obvious: I miss summer dearly.
However, I dedicate this blog to the one thing that provides me joy and laughter whenever the weather sucks balls.

It's the fact that I've been in extremely awkward situations the past couple of days because I tend to slip out some histerical giggles. If I was someone else, I'd think I was a total freak.

Must hold it in, hold it in, holdddd it in...

No luck.

Every morning, every afternoon, every night I go out...I wait for the bus. Generally, I'm late, so I pretty much ALWAYS miss the bus and usually run after it. That never helps, I miss it anyway, so I sigh and return to the bus stop and sit down as I wait for the next one to enrich my life and hopefully get me to my destination IN TIME.
I get bored. Need distraction, seeing as the coldness slowly penetrates my skin like sharp knives. I'm easily cold. Matter of fact, I'm always cold! Can't feel my hands, where are my toes? Why are my nipples so hard and my ears are burning. Only option left in order to entertain myself: I observe my surroundings. And I start observing people. How they move, how they interact...It's fascinating (stalker alert, pretty much?)
Seriously, I sometimes laugh internly and try to hold it in because...It's funny.
So funny.

It has been snowing the last couple of days. It's quite beautiful. And I can't help but notice... The face expressions. People falling down. The extreme carefulness. The red noses.

Not sure, nevertheless I assume I'm not the only one noticing how everyone's face expressions change drastically with the change of the weather.

So picture this:
I'm waiting five minutes for the bus. And in that five minute process I saw two people fall right infront of me.

Some dude on a bike almost slipped on the road. He caught my attention because he reminded me of Kenny (Southpark). He had his hood up (gangstaaa) and was wearing a orange, exaggerated thick coat. Wrapped up in wool. So, there he goes on his bike...Macho man made a very awkward movement, sort of like a hop, to save himself from the embarrassment of falling sideways and ending up on the street with his bike above him. I bet he'd look like a turtle if he fell down: the difficulty of getting up due to loss of balance, I don't think anyone could walk normally, wearing such a huge coat. He could barely move. Then his face of total panic. I'm giggling right now just by picturing the whole scene again.
Then some lady walking extremely careful on the snow, taking microscopic steps, looking overly concentrated as she took them, holding her arms up awkwardly for balance.
Bang, bitch fell down.

Look around you: everyone, EVERYONE tries their very best not to fall. Their eyes reflect full concentration on every movement. Their faces either amused by the situation, or simply annoyed.

And especially when it's windy. People hold their coats by their collar with one hand as they lean forward a little, an attempt to move on, to walk past the wind...trying not to get blown away. Their faces show everything but pleasure.

Dude, what about the umbrellas? That's the best of the best, man. Individuals fighting an endless battle against their umbrellas in the middle of the streets, trying to stop them from flying away and being broken by the strength of the wind. The umbrella flies from right to left, up and down, as you hold it, as you try to get a grip of it. And what do you generally do? You laugh. So hard. Because it's so fucking annoying, it gets fucking funny. At least I think so.

Just for the records: I'm not an evil bitch that sits there and laughs at people instead of helping them. Ok...So maybe I am.
It's just that I'm...easily amused. I'm all up for laughing at stupid shit.
Trust this: I can be quite clumsy. And I've fallen down many many times because of the snow before. Not even because of the snow, just because I trip on my own feet. What I mean to say, is that I've been through it too, so I have the right to laugh as much as people have laughed about me. I didn't care. It's all part of the process...

I feel so much respect for Mary Poppins right now.

Erika.